I got my first smartphone when I was 13.
I remember the feeling of happiness that I had because I did not have to say goodbye to any of my friends and leave my parent’s computer. I was finally going to be online all the time.
From that moment, I never stopped using my phone.
I took it everywhere. To school (even though it was forbidden), to the church, to the bathroom, I slept with it under my pillow; I just never was without my phone.
I became a zombie of my phone.
There were moments when it was wrong using it, but I managed to use it anyways. I never felt like it needed a break, even when the situation called for it, and I’ve always been proud of the times I could get away with it when I shouldn’t have used it.
The consequences began two years later.
School finished every day at 4 pm, and it was impossible to focus after that time. I couldn’t do chores or homework, and I had no energy for anything. So I just ate dinner and used my phone until I fell asleep.
I didn’t understand why, but I could only do homework in the morning when no one was awake. I used to wake up at 4 or 5 am every day to study for tests and do my homework for the day.
Now I know that was because I was overstimulated and lost my focus. So the mornings were the only moment to do any other activity that didn’t involve my phone.
I simply managed to make everything else work so I could keep using my phone instead of stopping using it so I could work on everything else because I never saw it as a real problem until this year.