Feel Like a Narcissist Magnet? The Reason You Attract Toxic Relationships

I was convinced I had a narcissist target branded on my forehead. Everywhere I turned, there was another narcissist, and I was the chosen target. Potential love interests, new friends, colleagues, you name it. It was like no one was safe like no one was healthy. After ending a long-term narcissistic relationship, I recognized the red flags. I also knew to end those toxic relationships quickly. Yet, the pattern was brutal. <ol> <li>Meet someone new.</li> <li>Feel excited, even giddy, that this new person came into my life.</li> <li>Think about them often — first thing in the morning, last thing each evening.</li> <li>Check my phone non-stop, so I won’t miss a communication.</li> <li>I stayed up late talking or disrupting what I was doing to take the call.</li> <li>See the red flags.</li> <li>End the relationship.</li> <li>Lather. Rinse. Repeat.</li> </ol> My trauma bond was running the show. It was like a beacon, summoning narcissists from all over the world. My trauma bond kept entangling me in narcissist drama, which only strengthened my trauma bond. It was crazy-making. <h2>What is a trauma bond?</h2> A <a href="https://medium.com/illumination/what-does-a-trauma-bond-with-a-narcissist-look-like-a36ff63cb70a" rel="noopener">trauma bond</a> is a chemical reaction in the nervous system of the victim. It requires both repetitive abuse AND rare or unpredictable pleasure. Imagine being put down by your boyfriend for 2 weeks — you’re told you’ve gained weight, you’ve let yourself go, your clothes are frumpy, you’re turning into your mother. <a href="https://medium.com/illumination/feel-like-a-narcissist-magnet-the-reason-you-attract-toxic-relationships-ae45372da005">Website</a>