God Ruins Yet Another Work Of Art With Love
<p>The scariest photograph I’ve ever seen was stapled to a hikers’ information board on a mountain in Maine.</p>
<p>It was a photo of a smiling boy. He’d gotten his picture taken up on a mountain, and something about him was very strange.</p>
<p>At first, I thought it was his smile. It looked wrong because it’s wrong to smile in photographs. That’s not who you are. If you ever get lost or stolen, we’ll tape your picture to telephone poles, and if you’re smiling in those pictures, you will never be found. That’s not your real face. Your real face is scared, bitter, bored, and hungry, and a disappointment to your parents.</p>
<p>Welcome to the human race, you smiling liar.</p>
<p>But it wasn’t his smile that was strange and wrong. His smile was actually real. Completely natural. I could tell because his eyes didn’t look like two holes full of desperation and shame.</p>
<p>It was his hair that was strange.</p>
<p>It was standing straight up.</p>
<p>This wasn’t bedhead. It hadn’t dried wildly after a swim. It was truly vertical. Cartoonish. A little like the hair of a kid rubbing balloons all over his head like a perv.</p>
<p><em>Exactly</em> like the hair of a kid standing directly beneath a bolt of lightning as it hunts for the perfect place to strike.</p>
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