Here Are Ten New Commandments We Should Follow

Good evening to all you wonderful people of Medium. You were created to read and write on Medium by the Almighty. Or by science. Perhaps by your parents when they were drunk and knockin’ boots on their first date many years ago. Today, I want to remind everyone about the Ten Commandments. God originally gave these to Moses up on a mountain. I think somewhere near a burning bush. That sounds like it had something to do with Jezebel. If the bush is burning, I say keep away from it. Otherwise, it’s likely to end up with a visit to the VD clinic. Prayer doesn’t work on everything. That could make for a new commandment. “Thou shalt not love an unclean man or woman.” Naw, who cares? I say, “Live and let live”. Bone whoever you want to bone. But it does make me wonder how we’re all doing with the original Ten Commandments. Let’s review them: <img alt="" src="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:700/0*_pdycwjt-q36AjJZ.png" style="height:497px; width:700px" /> The original Ten Commandments, in all of their purple glory. Photo: Author If you’re into Christianity, chances are that you’ve fucked up on a few of these. If you’re not religious or don’t believe in a higher power, then don’t worry about this blog. Just hang out for 30 seconds, highlight a sentence, and leave me a comment. Do unto others, as they say. Shit. I just coveted your attention. That broke #10. Damn it. Well, I don’t put much stock into organized religion. The fact that many Christians don’t follow these worth a damn demonstrates a level of hypocrisy that I just can’t stomach. They break #1 and #2 constantly with the worship of Donald Trump, money, and greed. #3? Goddamn it, they break that one constantly, as well. #4? I venture to say that many self-identifying Christians are a home yelling profanities at their favorite football teams on Sunday instead of sitting in church. <a href="https://medium.com/bouncin-and-behavin-blogs/here-are-ten-new-commandments-we-should-follow-fc93de6a3652">Learn More</a>