Are My Co-Workers Murderous Aliens or Do I Have Imposter Syndrome?

To Whom It May Concern in the HR Department, I’ve finished my first day here at Human Management Inc. and while I’m thankful for the opportunity, I have a few small concerns. I don’t know exactly where to begin because I’m new to human management as a career and some of this uneasiness might be due to inexperience. I’ll just walk you through some of the scenarios that made me uncomfortable. When I first arrived at the office, I was met by a very well-dressed man wearing a name tag that read Jim. However, everyone else called him Vlurg. When I asked him if Vlurg was a nickname, he hissed into my face for 30 seconds. I’ve experienced my fair share of office hazing but this felt different. It felt a lot like Jim was holding back from eating me. Again, I’m new to human management so this might have been some sort of training tactic I don’t understand but I’d kick myself if I didn’t raise this concern. The next curious incident involved the decor of the office. I loved the ping-pong tables and the soda machine but I was taken aback by the giant pods covered in glowing larvae. I was a little nervous to ask Jim about them because of the hissing incident but I would appreciate it if you could shed some light on their purpose. Are they a human management tool? Can we have meetings in them? Is the loud croaking/moaning noise that comes out of them normal? After the tour, Jim invited me to have lunch with two other employees, Jimmy and James. When I went to shake their hands, they gyrated for a minute, sniffed the back of my neck, then let out loud guttural noises that gave me the impression that the two were imagining what I tasted like. While that was a very strange start to the outing, I was even more surprised by the food they ate. I brought a ham sandwich and some chips, so I felt extremely self-conscious when the three of them inhaled about 100 live goldfish, emptied an aquarium full of electric eels and hammerhead sharks into their unhinged jaws, before polishing off a few 90s-era Lunchables. I know this might not be your place to comment but does everyone at the company eat so exotically? <a href="https://muddyum.net/are-my-co-workers-murderous-aliens-or-do-i-have-imposter-syndrome-b88242a17fcd">Website</a>