I Can’t Believe I’m Just Finding Out That I Was Half-Married for Years

<blockquote> <p>&ldquo;You&rsquo;re going to keep going to marriage counseling by yourself?&rdquo; asks my friend.</p> <p>&ldquo;Yes,&rdquo; I say. &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t know what else to do. He says he won&rsquo;t continue going and things aren&rsquo;t getting any better in our marriage. If anything, it feels like it&rsquo;s getting worse. He won&rsquo;t work with me to fix our issues but he&rsquo;s not leaving me either.&rdquo;</p> </blockquote> <p>This is my own personal oxymoron.</p> <p><strong>Couples counseling for one.</strong></p> <p><em>These are excruciatingly agonizing years.</em></p> <p>I don&rsquo;t remember anyone asking me if I was half-married.</p> <p>I remember sitting with my girlfriends bemoaning my marital woes. I remember having to bend their ears because my husband seemed to have misplaced his.</p> <p>But I don&rsquo;t remember being asked if I was half-married.</p> <p><strong>I do remember other questions.</strong></p> <blockquote> <p>&ldquo;Are you saying your marriage is in trouble?&rdquo;</p> <p>&ldquo;Are you saying you&rsquo;re not very happy with your husband right now?&rdquo;</p> <p>&ldquo;Are you saying your husband refuses to return to marriage counseling?&rdquo;</p> <p>&ldquo;Are you saying there&rsquo;s uncertainty in your relationship?&rdquo;</p> <p>&ldquo;Are you saying you&rsquo;re maritally surviving, not thriving?&rdquo;</p> <p>&ldquo;Are you saying that your husband has checked out?</p> </blockquote> <p>Yes, I&rsquo;m saying all of those things and more.</p> <p>Worse, I&rsquo;ve been saying them for one too many years.</p> <p><a href="https://medium.com/hello-love/i-cant-believe-i-m-just-finding-out-that-i-was-half-married-for-years-a94264ec9d75">Website</a></p>