The First Highland Games Coincides With the Appearance of Hominid Dingus Battus
<p><strong>The origins of the Highland Games are shrouded in the mists — read volcanic sulphury-scented smog — of time and reeked of testosterone, yet that doesn’t prevent archeologists, paleontologists, and pseudo-scientific geniuses like me from speculating.</strong></p>
<p><strong>There is a strong possibility that the origins of these games stemmed from a “pissing contest” that erupted between ruling tribes.</strong> The more inebriated the men became, the rowdier and the fuller their bladders. It quickly became clear they needed to keep things from becoming deadly — since killing off their best and strongest men was not in the best interests of the chieftains. They relied on these men for protection. Instead, they proposed one-upmanship games to test the physical prowess of the men. That way, nobody gets “kilt.” And you can sell tickets.</p>
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