Asking the Terrifying Question, What If I’m Actually Incapable of Love?

<p>I&rsquo;ve experienced moments of being undeniably and wholly consumed with love &mdash; in family, friendship, romance, nature, creativity, and spiritual pursuits.</p> <p>We&rsquo;re talkin moved to tears, love. Feel it in my bones, love. Capital L love.</p> <p>However, I&rsquo;ve also felt periodic moments of alienation and nihilistic, existential self-doubt wherein I question my very capacity for love. We&rsquo;re talkin born alone, die alone doubt. Terminally unique doubt. Capital D doubt.</p> <p><em>What if I&rsquo;m incapable of love?</em></p> <p>Maybe you&rsquo;ve experienced the private embarrassment of not knowing the answer to this terrifying question. Perhaps you&rsquo;ve somehow managed to evade it altogether (good for you). But I recently had the opportunity to reflect on it and wanted to share my musings.</p> <h1><strong>Prerequisites for Love</strong></h1> <p>What is required of us to truly love?</p> <p>To begin with, a profound sense of connection and belonging is necessary.</p> <p>When I feel alone, isolated, and different (which is what&nbsp;<a href="https://medium.com/p/5fc3c47a2d0e" rel="noopener">trauma</a>&nbsp;does to everyone, btw), it&rsquo;s difficult for me to give and receive real love. I can &ldquo;perform&rdquo; love, mimic love, and do lovey-looking things.</p> <p>But to truly feel it deep down &mdash; to&nbsp;<em>be</em>&nbsp;love &mdash; I have to know you, be known by you, and know that we&rsquo;re part of the same whole. Made of the same stuff. Inextricably linked. No better than or less than. No separation, secrets, pretense, or yeah buts.</p> <p><a href="https://medium.com/adam-rebecca-murauskas/asking-the-terrifying-question-what-if-im-actually-incapable-of-love-c32cb3bd5596">Click Here</a></p>